My Grand-Little Fell in Love with my Cousin on Tinder – Dating in a Modern Society

If you’re over 30 there’s a good chance you didn’t understand the above sentence, and that’s okay.

Definitions for a Modern Society: 

Grand-Little: In my sorority I have a “little sister” (like a mentee? best friend?) who has her own “little sisters.” So this is third generation.

Falling in Love: Being infatuated with someone. Not actually love tbh.

TBH: To be honest.

Tinder: An app for smartphones that let’s you choose who your soulmate is based on looks and a short bio.

Smartphones: lol just kidding

First let me vent about how overly connected our world is. It’s nice to have friends. But do you really need to know day to day updates from 1500 ‘friends,’ most of whom I’m assuming you haven’t talked to in years (if ever at all)? I have heard those people that say “no these are all seriously my friends” in which case I feel as though you don’t understand the definition of the word friend (see a dictionary for further information). It’s hard for me to find the correct equilibrium here, because if I don’t engage on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc., I could miss out on something important. Like my best friend’s cousin’s friend getting engaged. Or the kindergarten graduation of my cousin’s child. (Obviously those things aren’t actually important to me) I like being able to keep in touch with people and up to date on their lives, but there’s a certain point where it just becomes too much.

It makes sense that the only thing that can really follow a friendship site for millennials (FB) is a dating site for millennials (Tinder). Which is the worst thing in the world. I mean yeah I had one for a while because honestly it was kind of fun to see who’s out there (some real winners let me tell ya (see below)) but I’ve moved past that. Because a boy asked me on a real date and it weirded me out. All I know about you is your first name and your face shape and you want to meet up with me? There’s a 50/50 chance you’re a serial killer, according to recent statistics (that I just made up). What happened to the old-fashioned meeting someone out in the real world? And by real world I am not referring to either of the popular nighttime locales on Forest Ave. I mean like in class. Or through a friend. Or at a sporting event. Or at work. Does this still happen to people or should I give in right now and create my profile?

That’s a joke. But really, this is what dating is like today. Nonexistent or existent only after some sort of influence by social networks (whether through Tinder swiping, facebook creeping, or tweet stalking). I’m not that into it, which is why I don’t have a boyfriend (lol that’s the reason probably).

Good luck to my precious grand-little, a beautiful and slightly naive freshman who doesn’t understand real world love yet (an assumption I’m making because I don’t understand it, and I’m a junior, which means I should be wiser than her) and to my cousin, a guy I actually don’t know very well because I only see him like once a year. I’m sure you will be very happy together, in whichever social media platform you choose to pursue in developing your relationship.

Enjoy the following prospect, he blocked out his own face (because he’s probably just too good looking to handle), I just hid his number (you’re welcome Real Male) (also sorry my phone is en español):



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